Review: The Act of Killing

This is an imperfect world. Mass oppressions, mass murders, and genocides still happens until today. Hundreds, thousands, even millions were slaughtered for meaningless reason. Nazi Germany, Communist Russia, racist Rwanda, racist Serbs, etc did that.

Decent people are always baffled by this, what kind of human beings were able to conduct such atrocities? How they deal with their empathy, their conscience? The movie maker Joshua Oppenheimer tried to somehow answer important questions like that with this documentary movie. 

The film started with an important disclaimer: unlike the Nazi Germany, or the Interhamwe militia in Rwanda, the perpetrators here were and still are the winners, people who have connections to the highest level of power in Indonesia. This is the movie about how some butchers from the 1960s "communist" massacres tried to create a movie to glorify their massacres. The movie focused especially on Anwar Congo, who before the massacre was a small-time movie theatre gangster (Preman in bahasa Indonesia).

The movie shows that those gangsters are so full of themselves. They proudly admit in front of camera how they enjoy those massacres, laughingly explained how they enjoy raping 14 years old "communist". Their pride is also extended to any other "gangster" activities, and even to the label "gangster"/preman itself. Many of them stated that the word preman came from the word "free man," people who are free, who want to do anything they like. Looks like that freedom includes freedom to threaten and extort some store owners in the market in front of a recording camera. Yes, they are THAT proud.

That pride even overcame their logic. In one scene, the gangsters re-enact the destruction of a communist village. The then-deputy of Sport Minister, Sakhyan Asmara come and lead the reenactment. After the shooting, he realized that such spectacle would impress the audience that the communists were the victims, and the gangsters were barbarous thugs. BUT, he also asked Oppenheimer NOT to delete that scene because "People need to know that Indonesians can be very furious when fighting against communist!"

That means this movie goes BEYOND the 1960s massacre. This is a documentary about Indonesia past and present gangster's culture. Oppenheimer asked Anwar Congo and his friends about "justice" and "truth." One of them said "truth is not always right, and justice is defined by the winner." As an Indonesian, I am sure there are millions who agree with this statement OR accept it as "unchangeable truth." This is exactly the reason why Indonesia will never become a developed country. Rule of law, human rights, and so many other civilized things are lower priorities in comparison with pride and personal fortune, they are SUBORDINATE to the existing gangster culture, and its acceptance by many Indonesians.

That alone make this movie fascinating, and there is one more important point here for me: the most important question is not about "justice" or the past. Not about whether those gangsters should be punished or not. For me, the future is far more important. That's why the biggest question is: 

"Can such atrocity happen again in Indonesia?" 
With such pride from doing it, with such glorification of previous atrocities, why not? And after second thought, I remember that the Shiah and the Ahmadis experienced similar atrocities TODAY. In essence, it is not the question "Can it happen again?" but "When will it stop?" At first, everything looks bleak. Looks like Indonesia is trapped in this appalling gangster culture. 

But, not all is lost. In the last part of the movie, Congo's empathy overcome his pride. He finally started to feel the pain of his victim after he played a communist sympathizer in one of the reenactment of the torture. We can clearly see from his eyes, from his body languages that the guilt finally manifested. Oppenheimer reminded him that he felt that EVEN THOUGH he knew that such torture is only a play, while all his victims knew their life would end shortly. Congo replied with "But I know Josh. I feel it." That scene alone give me hope that conscience exists, that such monstrosity is not acceptable, that Indonesia can overcome its gangster culture.

Nevertheless, it has to be stressed that looks like Anwar Congo is the exceptional case. His compatriots don't show any remorse or guilt. Indonesia still in the long way to reach "post-gangster culture" where rule of law & human rights are the norms, not mass murder & coercion.

Final verdict: 100/100. Thank you Joshua Oppenheimer, for sharing with the world the true face of Indonesia, for giving me hope that not all is lost. Let the world know the complete picture of Indonesia. Let Indonesians become aware of this atrocities and all madness that follows ...

The Big Blue Fleet

One of the most memorable thing in the movie Red Cliff is the epic feeling that radiated from the silver screen when they show Cao Cao's battle fleet on Yangtze river. Warship after warship were pumped, covering the horizon like one big blanket, all ready for action, in battle formation! Hell yeah!

Hey Hollywood  why not emulate that? I have one candidate: the big blue fleet or the 3rd/5th fleet or as I call it in my previous writing, "the FUCK YEAH Fleet" during the second world war! Make a movie about their exploit in the 2nd world war! You can begin with the battle of Philippine Sea, and end it with the fight against Kamikazes off Okinawa! Or no, make it a trilogy. The first one is going to cover the Fifth Fleet under Spruance in the Battle of Philippine Sea/The Great Marianas Turkey Shoot. The second part is going to portray the 3rd fleet under Halsey in the Battle for Leyte Gulf. The Last part is going to tell the story about the kamikazes attack off Okinawa, when Spruance starts the command, and Halsey relieve him. HOW COME NOBODY MAKE THIS MOVIE? Here are 4 reasons why it will be a fantastic movie:

1) The Size

At its peak, this fleet has 20 fleet carriers, 8 battleships, and several hundreds cruisers and destroyers. That means, they could swarmed ANY Japanese base with 1000 aircraft. Oh, since USA didn't have any massive base in Pacific at that time, they also created service squadrons, which were de facto mobile bases! They can be repaired, re-fueled, and re-supplied in any lagoon, gulf, or any other calm-water area on Pacific.

The Fuck Yeah Fleet in action!

The largest ship in the fleet, USS Iowa,
serviced by the service squadron.
Told ya  it was a mobile base.

To put into perspective, this fleet is the largest fleet EVER! No country at that time, can match the size ofthe big blue fleet. Not the British, not the Japanese, NONE! They can gather every single warship they had and they are still numerically AND qualitatively inferior in comparison with the Fuck Yeah Fleet! Oh, by the way, they are only FRACTION of the US Navy of that time. At that time, the 7th fleet actively supported MacArthur, and had more or less same size, although their ships is older and they only used the small and slow escort carriers instead of fleet carriers.

Now imagine, seeing the Pacific Ocean from a bird-view perspective ... then slowly all the badass warships appear on the screen. Slowly, we will apprehend the enormous scale of the fleet. Slowly, we will be aware that all of those ships cover the whole horizon ... and more! Imagine that happens in 3D!! No, even better ... in IMAX!! I'll pay the ticket TWICE for that epic scene alone!

2) The Message

Hey, Hollywood has created tons of money every time they make movie about America thumpin its chest. This movie will do that exactly! 

For those history-ignorant reader, do you know who the "Fuck Yeah Fleet" fightin? The nasty Japanese. You know, the one that is DESPISED by everyone in Pacific even until today? Yeah, the one responsible for "The rape of Nanking" and the one who systematically organized sex-slavery all across the Pacific. Heck, they even try to whitewash those history in their history book instead of admitting and regretting it! They, arguably, is even better choice for a villain than the Nazi Germany! It is a just war, a clear-cut war that had to be won, unlike controversial wars in Vietnam ... or Iraq. 

3) The Finance

Don't tell me you don't have enough money to finance this kind of movie. Unlike "Avatar," there is no need for you to create the world, we have lots of oceans. Oh, and since it is an "American chest-thumping" movie, you can ask the navy to finance at least part of it. And you can help the finance of USPS too! More about that later ...

4) The Title
Heck, I even have a PERFECT title for this flick! Just name it like the best book title I have ever heard: "Eagle Against The Sun"! Is it catchy? Of course! Is it symbolic.? Hell yeah! Is it badass? FUCK YEAH! 

That has been said, the movie is not without risk. I have some tips about the risks too.

Tip 1: Keep Michael Bay or anyone with same mentality from this movie!

Seriously, think to make the continuation of "Tora Tora Tora" instead of "Pearl Harbor." The point is, the history of the Big Blue Fleet is already KICK ASS, no need to create a bullshit love story as the core. Other than that, it is not only about "stuffs blowing up" it is also about history, about a fight that the United States has endured. Don't repeat the mistakes of Pearl Harbor, bullshitting everyone that the movie is about the historical event, only to focus on a love story between 3 fictional characters.

Tip 2: You can make it big or small.

If you want to make it big, make one of the admiral (Halsey, McCain, Spruance, Mitscher, Nimitz, etc.) as the main character. This will make the movie play in macro-level, just like Tora-Tora-Tora. But you can make it small too. Put a sailor in Halsey or Spruance flagship as the main character. That way you can juggle with small-personal scale and macro-scale if you need to. If you want to make it small, assume it is a parallel story to "The Pacific" NOT the continuation of "Pearl Harbor."

Tip 3: If you really insist to put a romantic story in it ...

... make it about the admiral or the sailor missed his wife/girlfriend, about they communicating via letters. That way you can promote USPS too, I heard nowadays they have financial problem. No need to put any kind of "taking your girlfriend in an illegal joyride" like in Pearl Harbor. It is even BETTER if you use ACTUAL letters for this part! Or maybe you can make the story about how admiral Halsey hate his wife if you choose to make him the main character.

Tip 4: PLEASE, make the Japanese speak Japanese!

This is the one thing that "Pearl Harbor" did right: the Japanese speak Japanese. It is not that difficult to find East-Asian movie stars who can speak Japanese, I really hope you don't screw this up!

I really hope someone can make this movie. Like I said, it will be a badass movie!

Review of "Rurouni Kenshin"

KENSHIIIIIINN!!

Adapting a story from a book or a serial to the silver screen is tricky.

You really want to attract new fans, so sticking to the original source material is not the best option. Besides, you may alienate the original fans too, since they can be bored by the predictability of the movie.

At the same time, once you change too much, you infuriate the existing fans of the original. Sometimes you do this AND non-fans still hate the movie. Just ask the original fans of "Starship Trooper", "Dragon Ball" and "Avatar: The Last Airbender" and many people who don't have any clue about the original, AND dislike those movies.

You also need to be careful not to STRETCH the material. Just ask the die-hard Tolkien fans who cursed Peter Jackson thanks to "The Hobbit."

At the same time, you also can't over-compressed the material. That's why nobody even try to make the movie version of Silmarillion or the Bible.

So, based on that difficulty, I already gave 70 out of 100 for this movie. It basically compressed the first season, or "Tokyo Arc" of the Rurouni Kenshin anime & manga into a 2 hour movie, changing some details and sequences, but keep the main story essentially intact. Well done.

After that, let's compare it with the anime and manga to get the final verdict.

1) Music

The music is on par with the anime. It enhance each scene, and none sounds like out of place. Since it is a tie, I add 0 to the final score of this movie.

2) Takeda Kanryu

Holy hell, how come they turn the uninteresting drug dealer from the manga and anime to this fascinating character? In the movie, he is definitely the comic relief AND one of the Big Bad. Sounds like an oxymoron? Not for him. Really. He is so over-the-top, that I enjoy every single moment of his appearance! Heck, he even has 3 entourages that comically always follow him! Add 25 point for this superb change!

3) Sagara Sannosuke

The opposite is the movie version of Sagara Sannosuke. Whenever I saw Zanza in the manga or anime, I instantly think "Wow, what a brash, impulsive, and explosive person!" Not with this version. He looks trying SOOO hard to looks cool. Zzzz ... minus 10 points for this disappointing modification.

4) Saito Hajime/Goro Fujita

Saito here is a badass. Just like the manga and anime version, he looks cool even when he didn't do anything. The problem is, he really didn't do anything. Really. The writer made him do an action near the end, but frankly, Kenshin and Zanza can do just find without Saito there. Argh, how come you mess him like that? I am A BIG Saito fan, but now I am in the opinion that the movie will be better if he didn't show up in it. Minus 10 points for under-utilization of the best characther in the franchise.

5) Hittokiri Battousai/Himura Kenshin

For me, the movie version of Kenshin is superior to the anime & manga version. The manga version is a little bit too ... bipolar for me. One second he is the stupid, clumsy bum, another second he suddenly become a badass, then in the next scene he become a melancholic-emo. WTH? Yes, I know he SUPPOSED to mask his skill and his pain, but that is still too much. In my opinion, the movie version of Kenshin capture that conflict far more subtle and natural. Add 10 point for this improvement.

6) Kamiya Kaoru, Myojin Yahiko & Takani Megumi

I don't like Kaoru because she is the very definition of "Damsel in distress." She screams with tears ("KEEENNSHIIIIN!!"), and it almost always pissed me off. Yahiko & Megumi are OK. As characters, they are not annoying, but not really special. That said, the movie version of them is exactly the same with the anime & manga version. Not really special, but not bad either. In the end, they add/substract 0 points.

7) The action scenes

Is it just me or the movie sometimes has difficulty to decide whether they want to have a super-human fighting scene or a realistic one? Jin-E, and Sannosuke, move realistically, but it looks like Kenshin and Saito have mastered the art of defying gravity and inertia ... it is minor, but it is still disturbing. Substract 5 points for this inconsistency.

Final Verdict: 80 out of 100. It is a very good adaptation. If you are a big Rurouni Kenshin fan, it won't disappoint you. If you don't have any clue about it, this is a good summary & re-telling of the 1st season.

Review: Sang Pencerah

SPOILER WARNING!!

I already said it before, but I need to repeat it again: many Indonesian movies are embarrassments. Many said "Sang Pencerah" (The Enlightener) is an exception. Hey, religion is also my point of interest, so I watch this movie with quite high hope.

Oh yeah, before I watched this movie, I watched the superbly written Red Letter Media's Titanic Review. Coincidentally, some of their criticisms for Titanic are also valid here. More on that later!

First the synopsis. This is the movie about the founding of Muhammadiyah, the 2nd largest Islamic organization in Indonesia. It is a modernist movement, which was founded by Ahmad Dahlan, in late 19th century Indonesia, which at that time was under Dutch colonialism. Dahlan is the main character of this movie. He was repeatedly opposed by the existing Islamic elites, who control the largest mosque in that area, who prefer the status quo to changes thought by Dahlan. The movie essentially follow this formula:

Enlightenment -> Preaching & application -> Violent response of pro status quo Islamic leaders -> Contemplation, accompanied with violin plays -> Enlightenment again!

Rinse and repeat.

The movie tries really hard to portrait the stubbornness, the refusal of the elites to change. It tries so hard that it forget that change is not good per se. For example, Dahlan tries to modernize Islamic education system by copying Western school, complete with chairs and tables. The elites branded Dahlan as "infidel," since he used "Infidel's chairs and tables" instead of simply sitting and studying on floor, like on mosque. But Dahlan never pointed out the reason WHY they have to switch to chairs and tables. Hey, I am no Muslim, but I can pointed out that studying on floor is far cheaper, spacious, and flexible. But no, the movie only want to say "Dahlan is so progressive and smart while the elites are stupid!"

Oh yeah, speaking about the elites, the movie also without any subtlety said that "Indonesians have to unite to fight against the Dutch who sucked our land!" But on the other hand, it almost totally AVOIDS one of the main historical reason of  the founding of Muhammadiyah: to fight back Christian missionaries. Heck, in one scene, it was shown that the Dutch officials and children thought that Islam was a backward and primitive religion, BUT they quickly CHANGED their mind only after a single demonstration of Dahlan's knowledge, wittiness, and teaching capability! Oh yeah, this was done AFTER Dahlan insulted a Dutch official as "fatso". Somehow that official didn't really take that insult personally and let Dahlan become a teacher at his school! Compare that with the fact that the Islamic elites in this movie ALWAYS oppose Dahlan, and even using VIOLENCE against his followers! Now, whose reign do you prefer? The once-ignorant Dutch who CAN CHANGE their mind after a single demonstration? Or the stubborn and violent local elites? I like this one, for once this movie didn't play it safe, but ... doesn't that means that the movie weakened its own "patriotic" message? And speaking about violence by the locals ...

There is one scene that made me shakes my head in disbelieve. It is the scene after the elites warned Dahlan for the first time to close his mosque. Dahlan KNOW that the elites already send an angry mob to his mosque. When the mob tore down the mosque, he went to, then hugged his father, and playing violin in contemplation. At the same time, his wife & disciples crying, watching the mob in horror, powerless to defend the mosque.

WHAT??

He left his wife and disciples to face the angry mob by themselves?? WHAT THE HELL, HERO? Then, in the next day, NOBODY pointed out this. Nobody.

So, with all those weaknesses, is this a bad movie? Not exactly. Let me refer to Red Letter Media's Titanic review: "It was shot superbly. Small details are not overlooked, every scene is gorgeous. Every music enhanced every scene. Technically, it is an excellent movie. Too bad the plot sucks." Same here. Almost every single scene magnify the beauty of Javanese village and houses. "Sang Pencerah"'s weaknesses are all plot related. 

Another point brought by Red Letter Media about Titanic: Cameron play it safe in terms of plot. It never try to dig deeper into the character, it never try to pose a moral dilemma to them. It always pointed out that the main character is the perfectly-good human while the antagonist(s) are total monsters. "Sang Pencerah" is better here, since in the end the highest elite actually repents. But it also play it safe, it refuse to confront an "ugly truth," for example, a simple fact that Muhammadiyah is also about confrontation against Christian missions. It also preached endlessly that "the Islamic way preached by Dahlan is better than local cultures," and since most Indonesians are Muslims, I don't see anything other than "I want to play it safe!" from this fact. Just like The Lady, it tries so hard to put its protagonist on pedestal, it only slipped during the mob-attack scene. Most of the time, it choose NOT to mention that Dahlan's foot is always on the ground, never hovering.

Final verdict: 55 out of 100. Watch it if you are interested in history of Indonesia, but with a grain of salt. BTW, I also love the fact how this movie put the colonial masters in more positive light than the local elites! But I suspect only few recognize this ...

Review of "Amos and Andrew"

After watching all the "circus" around 2012 US presidential election, where both sides threw "racist" accusation left and right, I was reminded of this vastly underrated comedy of error from the 1993: "Amos and Andrew."

Seriously, if you want to have basic knowledge about racism in USA, just watch this movie.

The movie is about a famous African-american professor and playwright, Andrew Sterling, who just moved to an island in New England. Very unfortunate of him, his white neighbor mistook him for a thief when they saw him set his stereo-set. They called the police, and a trigger-happy officer shot him. Repeatedly. The police realized their mistake later, but it was too late. So, they tried to cover it up. They made a deal with a petty criminal named Amos O'Dell, forced him to take Sterling's hostage. Meanwhile, the neighbors who started all this mess were pissed since they felt that they deserved MORE attention from the media, so they contact all major medias and started a national crisis. When a black-reverend friend of Sterling saw this, he lead an angry-black mob to the scene. Of course we all know this couldn't end well for anybody ...

First, the main casts & characters. Both Nicholas Cage who played Amos O'Dell and Samuel L. Jackson who played Andrew Sterling, put beautiful performances. Cage really used his "lazy bum" persona to maximum effect here, while Samuel L. Jackson showed that he can acts in role other than "a tough mothafucka" that become his image in all his well-known movies.

Second, the supporting casts and characters. The inept policemen really cracked me up whenever they were on screen. One of them even painted his face BLACK before "kicking some shit." So does the racist neighbors. And their dog. Aaaah, their adorable WHITE dog is so CUTE!!

Third, let's talk about racism. Unlike other movie that used racism as its theme, "Amos and Andrew" escaped the "all blacks are victims and many whites are racists" cliché.  It depicted racism from BOTH the whites and the blacks, and showed how racism imploded BOTH sides. Oh yeah, despite being a criminal, Amos O'Dell is actually THE LEAST racist important character in this movie, while on the other hand, Andrew Sterling is arguably one of the most racist. And that reverend friend of Sterling was a certified bigot-idiot who ALWAYS feels victimized. This is what I dislike from "racism" discourse in the US: many blacks react against racism from the whites with their own racism. Sometimes, whites even feel compelled to reverse their racism by doing "positive" racism. Just ask any blacks or whites who voted for Obama ONLY because of his skin color. This movie eloquently pointed out that both sides can be racist, and both sides would end in fire, sooner or later, if they keep it up.

Oh, one last thing. Ironically Samuel L. Jackson actually gave his vote for Obama ONLY because of the similarity of their skin color. Looks like he really forget this movie.

In the end, this movie never lost steam. It cracked one smart joke after another, from the beginning until the end. Kudos for that. A solid 95 out of 100. Watch it, especially if you want to know about racism in USA.

Review of "The Lady"

If you have read anything about Burma/Myanmar from the media and hope that this movie will provide more information, keep your expectation low. Very low. Bottom-of-the-barrel low.

Let me summarized the movie in one sentence: innocent-pure-kind hearted-one dimensional Suu Kyi fight against power hungry-cruel-demonic-one dimensional military generals. Yes, this is a typical Hollywood flick. Pure "entertainment" complete with oversimplification and cheesiness.

The filmmakers did EVERY SINGLE TRICK to make Suu Kyi looks angelic, and the generals looks devilish. They showed how Suu Kyi's father singing Kumbaya with the minorities leaders, and Suu Kyi herself said "Democracy without the minorities is meaningless." Another example, when Suu Kyi waited the acceptance speech of her Noble peace prize, the evil military cut-off power to her house at the last minute to make sure she can't used her radio! When that scene started, I already sighed and muttered "please, oh please don't use this trick. Please ..."

Thanks to the film one-dimension portrayals, no wonder after the first 20 minutes, I started to see a halo on top of Michelle Yeoh's head, and some fire & brimstone when the generals gathered. I even convinced that the generals headquarter is located at Mount Doom.

Hey, why don't they mention the Panglong agreement? In that agreement, basically some minorities have the right to secede  from the Burmese state. Why they don't incorporate this important detail in Suu Kyi's struggle? Maybe because ... it will make the conflict not one-dimensional? Ah the horror of the higher dimensions ...

What else bothered me? Let's see ... other than the "love for her country," this movie is also focusing on the love story of Suu Kyi and her families. It could be interesting but since this is a one-dimension film, it became so cheesy that no cheese-based snacks was allowed in the theater. Add to the facts that I am aware of how it would end because I follow the development of Burma to some degree, there is no surprise at all. Zzzz ...

Final verdict: 50/100

It could be lower, but I am aware that for so many people who has no clue about Burma, this film could be very moving.

Some Crossovers I Really Want

We have tons of franchises and heroes. And we all love crossover, just check how much money The Avengers made. So, like everyone else, I have my own list of crossovers that needs to be done. And here ... we ... GO!

Norman Stansfield vs The Joker
Media: Movie

I already mentioned this in my Top 10 Villains article. So let me elaborate this ...

First, Stansfield was transferred to Gotham city. There, our junkie-corrupt cop visited every single mobs. Imagine their face when they saw Stansfield coming into their house playing Beethoven on his iPod. First they laughed at him. "DEA? Who do you think I am?" said them while belittling the drug addict Stansfield. That is only 2 seconds before Stansfield kicks their ass so hard until they vomit their appendix, scaring those mafia boss shitless. Stansfield will sit on top of the drug business in matter of DAYS if not hours.

Second, every single mafia boss who were still breathing resented this psycho DEA who butchered some of their best men and now squeezed their money like an orange for breakfast. Enter the Joker to the picture. Then we will see Gotham on fire. Unlike Batman, Stansfield won't give a shit about innocence life. Maybe he will even blow up half of Gotham and blame the Joker for it. Maybe after they met eye-to-eye they decide that this is TOO MUCH FUN, so they will obliterate the whole East-Coast while hearing Beethoven.

This time we can use the tagline "Whoever wins, we lose" accurately!

Punisher vs Batman 
Media: Movie
Yes, I know, there is at least 2 comics that already did this. But seriously, this crossover needs a big-screen treatment! Seriously, despite the similarity of their profession, the difference between these 2 are so contrast One is a sadistic vigilante, the other is a vengeful crusader. One is a gun-maniac, the other has strict no-gun policy. And so on. When both of them met, I am 1000% sure it will be interesting.

For the story, just say Ra's Al Ghul wants to slaughter every single human being in Gotham, just like in the Dark Knight trilogy. Somehow, Barracuda who heard something fishy about to happened in Gotham tried to used it for his own advantage, and the Punisher is in hot pursuit. After that, we witness how they become aware about the presence of the others,

Punisher starts killing every single League of Shadows member he encounters, especially after he know their history. He also swears to end Ra's reign for good. Batman, not so happy about it, will try to reason with Frank Castle, but his priority is still to stop Ra's genocide. On the other hand, after come into agreement for a cooperation, Ra's and Barracuda will betray each other back and forth, and for the climax ... does a 4-way fight on top of Wayne manor sounds good enough? To top it, in the end Frank Castle is forced to spare Ra's, while Batman has to kill Barracuda to save millions.

That would be BAD-ASS!


(Any) Gundam vs Xenogears
Media: Anime or Video Game

Admit it, if you are a giant-robot geek, you want this too!

For the story, I don't give a damn, I just want to see a Gundam fighting Xenogear, just put any story from any "Super Robot Wars" to this crossover! 

Just give me beam blaster vs Ether fight!

Star Wars vs Star Craft
Media: Video Game or Movie
You maybe wonder why from all sci-fi crossover, I pit Star Wars against Star Craft. That's because both of them fight massively on space, on air, and on land.

Mon Calamari Cruiser vs Imperial Star Destroyer vs Behemoth Class Battlecruiser vs Protoss Carrier? Terrific!

Jedi vs Sith vs Ghost vs Dark Templar vs agent of the Swarm? Holy hell!

The story could be like this: the Sith who controlled the Empire managed to find a way to Koprulu Sector. They used their mind trick to mind control, or at least influenced the Overmind and its Zerg Brood, starting an unholy alliance, and start conquering the Koprulu Sector. The Rebels & Jedis find a way to contact the Protoss, but were horrified when they learn about Zeratul and his Dark Templars. But since the Empire-Zerg combo is too deadly, the holier-than-thou jedis have to tolerate the Dark Templars. Especially after Arcturus Mengsk and his Dominion forces allied themselves with the Empire. After hard-fought battles, the Rebels, the Protoss, and Jim Raynor's forces defeated the other side, so Mengsk double-crossed the Empire. Attacked from inside-out, the Empire was forced to retreat to the Star Wars galaxy.

Sounds interesting enough for me!

Star Trek vs Babylon 5
Media: Movie or TV Series
Unlike the previous sci fi crossover, this crossover focused on space battle. Heck, as an inside joke, throw Walter Koenig between them.

It will be fun to watch the more agile Star Trek ships fighting against the mammoth Babylon 5 Ships.

It will be  exciting to witness how the Borg Collectives fight the Shadow.

It will be interesting to see how Picard and Sheridan argues ...

Oh boy ... that is a sci-fi geek wet dream, we can only wish ...

And Finally ...

EVERYONE from THIS LIST vs Hannibal Lecter/Jason Vorhees/ANY horror characters.
Media: "Merry Slaughter" sounds like a good movie or Video Games title!
YES, I really want to see some action/horror character slaughter those annoyin characters! Please bring some wood-chipper!

Seriously, I will WATCH the movie in theatre AS LONG AS IT RUNS, even if the whole 2 hours were just a gore-fest, showing how those annoyin characters butchered and tortured by any of those horror monster, without any plot, without any explanation! I despise horror movie, but this movie will be considered as COMEDY by me. I am sure I will laugh so hard during the movie that I should wear a diaper so it won't get dirty.

Wait ... that is just disturbing ... I mean ... shit and piss on the theatre? Gross! Better not to eat or drink anything before I watch it!

Or another choice is to make it a video game! Oh yeah, finally I can torture that überbitch and watch her die! DIE DIE DIE!

4 Overrated Characters and Franchises

I already stated that I have allergic reaction some tropes. And add another 4. Then I notice I dislike some characters and franchises that everybody likes. Yup, this time it is far more specific than "tropes" or "genres". So, let's see what are 4 characters and franchises that I consider overrated, that I hate but sooo many people love ...

I bet after the appearance of the Super Saiyans, you
forget that this anime/manga is about a race to collect
7 Dragonballs

Dragon Ball

Dragon Ball anime & manga is stupid. No, it is not just stupid but SEVERELY stupid. Especially after the Freeza arc. There are MILLIONS of ways to utilize Shenlong and Dragonballs they never consider. To defeat their enemies, Goku and his friends could ask some things from Shenlong like ...

1) To be invincible!
No fight was needed, you got victory without breaking any sweat! Why nobody do this? Oh yeah, because if they do that, there will be no more menace. Huh? isn't that actually the point to ensure the security of earth?

2) To be 100x times stronger than their enemy!
If they are uncomfortable to be "invincible", they could at least wish to be 100 times stronger than their enemy! Oh, Boo menaces the earth? Tough luck you pink bastard, let's summon Shen-Long, and make Goku 100x times stronger than Boo, BOOM, no more Boo, problem solved!

3) to send Cell/Buu/ANY ENEMY to another unreachable dimension!
Again, no fight was needed, the threat will be contained, and the universe will be saved, HURRA! Why this wish escaped Goku and his pals?

4) to create unbreachable barrier around earth/solar system/whatever!
This way Raditz, Vegeta, Freeza, and many other menaces from outside earth won't be able to touch earth. Again, why they never asked this?

And so on, you got the point right?

And don't say that the story can't be exciting if they are THAT intelligent in utilizing it! The story should be structured like the early arcs, A RACE TO COLLECT THE DRAGONBALLS! That's why my favorite arcs are the first ones like the Piccolo arc and the Freeza arc, because those they involved the utilization of the Dragonballs, with races to collect 7 Dragonballs, not a mere "Powerful monster vs powerful protagonist"! Unfortunately, the Freeza Arc is the last time they did this, after that the Dragonballs was reduced to Deus ex Machina to revive all humans who were killed by "monster of the week", and to modify people's memory. LAME!

Wolverine
I really don't get it. Yeah he is a badass, and? What else? Let's see ... he is always angry, unkillable, undestructable ... huh? That's it? Oh yeah, he has sideburns too! As hairy and as thick as possible! Huh? Anything else?

Of course not. Roger Ebert noted that Wolverine has no charisma, never say anything witty or intelligent, and all  of "noises" spitted by his mouth "are limited to the vocalization of primitive forces: anger, hurt, vengeance, love, hate, determination." In other words: he is a stupid-savage-beast. Give any caveman or Neanderthal "healing-factor" and adamantium, and you got the same thing. Snore ...

Face it: Wolverine is the Justin Bieber of the X-Men: hugely popular for stupid reasons. That makes him a far cry from a good character. Like Bieber too, he makes far more interesting and cooler characters like Gambit, Beast, or anyone else get less attention they deserve. That's why I despised not only X-Men 3, but also X-Men 2. Both of those abominations should be named "Wolverine and pals." 

From wikipedia

Rei Ayanami
Neon Genesis Evangelion is a masterpiece for many. I enjoy many episodes of it, but other episodes just too ... wacky for me. But that's fine, I could understand why people love the series.

One thing that I don't understand is, WHY EVERYONE IS OBSESSED WITH REI AYANAMI?  Everytime I heard any discussion about Evangelion, Ayanami ALWAYS become the hot topic, "Wow, Ayanami is so hot!" or "Ah, I wish I can be Ayanami's boyfriend!" or "Ayanami is too beautiful!"  Really? Why why why WHY?

Look, don't get me wrong, I am FAR from hating her character, but still, she is an emotionless-blank slate! Maddox made a good argument why the Android David in Prometheus is NOT a good character. You could praise Michael Fassbender in playing him, but the fact is, he has no emotion, no motive, NOTHING, just like a toaster! Same thing could be said about Ayanami, SHE IS SO BLANK!! If you really want Rei Ayanami as your girlfriend, better put some wig and tight suit to your toaster, that's basically the same deal.


Harry Potter
I already said in my "Top 10 most hated characters" list, I hate anyone who keep saying about "The chosen one" or "Destiny." Since everyone in Hogwarts keep reminding us that Harry here is "the chosen child," I give my middle finger to this franchise.

What else ... ah, now I remember how the Nostalgia Critic explained why the whole franchise is screwed up. Growing up while EVERYONE reminds you that you are "the chosen one" put a mega-ton emotional burden to that poor kid! They are lucky Harry managed to pass his puberty without any mental scar. Oh yeah, other than all the fuss about "the chosen one,"  Hogwarts also drowned some of their students for a-water polo game. Nice education you have there! As muggles, we are spared from that hazardous underwater competition! Ah yeah, speaking about Hogwarts, education, and the muggles ...

I am also turned-off by the smugness of everyone in Hogwarts who consider muggles/non-magic users as fools. Tips to all Harry-Potter reader: "Consider everyone who don't know your talent as stupid-ignorant-fools." Gee, I wonder why I felt that this generation is far more smug than anything before ...

Hey jackass, I wonder how your magic could invent the first television? Or the first computer? No wonder everyone consider math & science "hard" and "boring," the magic users of Hogwarts always reminds their audiences how superior "magic" and "superstitious" is, how some "prophecy" is more trustworthy than critical thinking or rationalism ...

I Am Allergic to These Tropes 2

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I Am Allergic to These Tropes

Like everybody else, I love some tropes, themes and genres in any kind of art. Diesel-punk? AWESOME! Big ships with big guns? Kick ass! Black humor? Hilarious! Satire? Hell yeah! Sci-fi complete with mad scientists? Bad ass! Musical-comedy? Cool!

On the other hand, I also got allergic reactions to some other tropes/genres. Here is some of them, in no particular order.

Horror!

From this blog

Really, I just don't get it. I am already afraid of global warming, biological or nuclear terrorist attack, and so many other real menaces, why I need to be frightened during my spare time? Why I have to pay to feel fear? Oh, don't forget about one more thing! Not only fear, many horror movies also used "shock" to excite its audiences. 

What? I still don't get it. 

In action movies and adventure literatures, fear is used to magnify the satisfaction you got when the protagonist finally overcome their challenge. In comedy, shock is used to amplify the funniness. In other words: they are means for delightful ends: satisfaction and laughter, while in horror, fears and shocks are the end itself.

Sorry, not for me. I prefer to enjoy other emotions during my leisure time. Though I may enjoy a "horror" movie/literature if the "horror" is downplayed. That's why I intentionally watched 13th Ghost, fully aware that it is a horror movie. And I love it too! I was fascinated by the house, by the story of each ghosts, not "horrified" by the "horror" caused by those ghosts, especially in the second half of the movies. I think that's also the reason why horror aficionado doesn't like it.

Pirates!

Folks, pirates are NOT romantic. Pirates are NOT cool. Unless "cool" means "plundering any village whenever and wherever I like!" I already wrote that Pirates are evil, nasty, despicable people by definition. Hoping for a kind pirate is like hoping for "A Nazi with a heart of Gold." They simply don't exist.

I have no interest in identifying myself with greedy, barbarous, mass-rapist, mass-murderers like them. I wish EVERY pirate die slowly and horribly as a nobody in an unknown island, screaming when receiving their karma, not glorified as ANY kind of hero in any media. NEXT!

From this blog

Zombies!
I hate Twilight series, but at least it is NOT about Bella Swan falling in love with a zombie! C'mon, zombie is not only rotten, ugly, and smelly, they are also slow, clumsy, and above all STUPID AS HELL! Where's the fun in watching any kind of interaction with such creature?

Ah, you may say that the fun is actually when you see the protagonist fighting a zombie horde, the thrill and fear of being overwhelmed by THOUSANDS of zombies? NAAAH, it is far more interesting seeing people fighting a horde of NORMAL PEOPLE. That's why I love to watch Black Hawk Down, and Commando. Or any Bruce Lee movie when he kicked a horde of goon's ass! A horde of normal humans provide more challenge and thrill then a zombie horde anytime.

So, any reason why a zombie horde can be more interesting than a living one? Let me guess, you want to argue that zombies know no fear, no pain! Err ... sorry, if that's the case, that means A ROBOT HORDE is far more menacing! Heck, a VACUUM CLEANER HORDE is far cooler than a zombie horde! Oh yeah, no fear and no pain also means they are even more STUPID than the most stupid man, increasing the problem that I mentioned earlier.

Hey ... wait a minute ... I've got an idea! Why use zombies? Replace all zombies with "idiot cannibals"! Here is the story: a virus reduces the IQ of its host by 90%, and skyrocketed their appetite for human flesh, making them feral, but change nothing else!  Same stupidity, without the ugliness, with more speed! That means all those movie makers can save money since they have no need to do any special makeup in their future zombie movie project!  Damn, I am a genius!

From this forum

ANYTHING with Vin Diesel!
Honestly, after mid 2000s, every time I saw any movie with Vin Diesel, I pass. Really. as far as I know, he always plays the VERY SAME CHARACTER. You know, the cool-wannabe-douchebag, complete with speech impediment.

ARGH, it is so painful! Everytime he opens his mouth, I felt a hammer hit a nail that already halfway in my ears! Everytime he moves, it is like a pneumatic drill hits my eyeballs!  The fact that his breakout role is the movie about some felons who think endangering lives and misusing public property is cool is not helping either!  Great job there Vin! So sorry for giving you my middle-finger instead of my thumb. 

I think I even prefer the zombies compare to this douche. At least the zombies become so repelling NOT because of their own choice! At least the zombies is not so pretentious ...

So that's it for now. Other than those 4, I also despise most movies with Santa Claus, Bugs Bunny, and many other things that I stated in "top 10 most hated characters" article. Maybe I'll add other things later ...

Addendum:
Based on some input from my brother, I add 4 more lame tropes.

Homage to The Raid

The cinema of Indonesia is an embarrassment. For years, it is full of embarrassing movies. like cheap & uncreative horrors, stupid dramas, depreciation comedies, etc. 

The dark era comes to an end with The Raid, released internationally as The Raid: Redemption.

The Raid is a high-octane movie about a SWAT raid to an apartment, full with criminals, ruled by a drug overlord named Tama. 

This movie more or less has the same target audience with the Expendables 2: MANLY MEN!! Yes the plot is stupid. Yes the dialog is ridiculous. Even more so if you understand Indonesian. But who cares, we come to see some Indonesians busting heads with each other, not Shakespearean dialog! And busting heads they do.  From the beginning until the end, this movie is full with fighting. Machetes are swung, guns are shot, necks are broken, bloods are splattered, and a kid even got killed on-screen. Too bad it is only one kid though, you'll know what I mean when you see the movie. All of that without "Matrix-style slow-mo" or any kind of that shit. Who needs wires and camera tricks if your fists and feet are badass enough?

Even more amazing, the protagonist of this movie, a rookie cop named Rama, is using silat in his fight. For those of you who never heard it, it is an Indonesian martial arts. Yup, this movie represented Indonesian culture too! So, next time when people from other countries asked "Hey, do you have any good Indonesian movie?" I can proudly answer "HELL YEAH! Just check how we break some bones INDONESIAN STYLE in The Raid: Redemption!"

Oh yeah, Rama also fight really pragmatically, using anything he can grabbed as a weapon, using all the environment around him to brutalize any criminal stupid enough to go anywhere near him. That really show how an Indonesian can easily utilized ANYTHING to kick your ass if we want.

Bottom line: Indonesians are nice & friendly people. You know, the type that reserve their energy so when the time of ass-kicking comes, we got PLENTY of energy to release! Unfortunately, many underestimate this kind of people. This movie proves that Indonesian really kick serious ass!

Final verdict: 90 out of 100. It is an obligatory watch for any action movie buff.

Homage to Punisher: War Zone

Punisher: War Zone is my ultimate "Guilty Pleasure" movie.

By that, I never mean I enjoy Punisher: War Zone as a terrible movie or despite it is a terrible movie. Hell no! This movie is easily on of my Top 10 favorite movie of all time! It is BEAUTIFULLY casted, shot, and directed, how come anyone say this movie is not awesome? Oh yeah, I forget most people are wimps. 

What I mean by "Guilty pleasure" is, I enjoy this movie in FULL AWARENESS that some of my enjoyment come from the fact that this movie showed how the Punisher butcher so many monsters.

C'mon admit it. You also have that joy, usually at the end of the movie, when the good guy finally kill the bad guy. Like in every Die Hard movies. Like in the end of most Schwarzenegger or Stallone's movie. For me, that kind of joy is a guilty pleasure.

The difference between The Punisher and those other movies is: you got that satisfaction from the beginning until the end, not only in the end. If you read his comic, especially the MAX series, you know exactly that every single killing he made induce that "guilty pleasure."  Almost in every chapter, every scene, Punisher is killing or torturing then killing some criminals whose humanity is CLEARLY non existent. This movie has exactly that same tone and atmosphere.

For example, The Punisher track down some junkies who were also parkour addict. The movie showed those junkies just robbed and butchered a shop owner by axing his head. Yup, the movie really showed a dead old man with a big axe on his head. Not to worry, shortly after that, the Punisher ambushed them on a roof. He blew up the first parkour junkie with a rocket, snipe the second one, and interrogate the last one ... before throwing him to a pointy fence, stabbing the junkie's chest from below, and finally the Punisher jumped on his neck! That tone and atmosphere create far superior "guilty pleasure" compare to the joy of seeing Schwarzenegger or Stallone mowed down the antagonist's mooks with big machine gun. If you prefer that kind of "guilty pleasure," don't worry, the Punisher also slaughtered those cannon fodders in over-the-top shoot-out.

Okay, let's begin with the nuts and bolts of this movie. 

The Story

The story is simple: Punisher slaughter a mafia family, Billy Rusotti escaped but his face was screwed, then he hunts the Punisher after freeing his batshit insane younger brother! Anything else are trivial. Many people complained the story is idiotic. Who cares!! This movie is about TONE, and ATMOSPHERE, what kind of story do you expect? The Godfather? Serpico? Silence of the Lambs? Naaah, this movie is too awesome, it never need any good story. NEXT!!

Thomas Jane
From this blog

Ray Stevenson
From this site

The Punisher

I already mentioned that the Punisher is one of my favorite character. In this movie, Ray Stevenson portrait him PERFECTLY! He is physically intimidating, hard like tungsten, but could show his sentimental side. After he killed the wrong guy, he really manned up to his responsibility, and visited the guy's widow, prepared to receive any retribution, even handing her a loaded revolver. In other words: he really got the Punisher's character.

This is in contrast with the previous Punisher: Thomas Jane. Look at him.

1) He is a pretty boy, not a nasty killing machine!!

2) He is a schemer, not a punisher!!

3) He never killed anyone by PUNCHING HIS FACE!!

Hands down, Ray Stevenson IS the Punisher. I am sure if both of them met, before Thomas Jane's Punisher can scheme anything, his head was already ripped off by a punch from Ray Stevenson's Punisher.

The Antagonists

As the main antagonist, we have Dominic West playing Billy Rusotti a.k.a Jigsaw. He is a narcisstic-sadistic-cartoony-douche whose pretty face screwed by the Punisher, burned by anger, but start crying whenever he saw a mirror. Lucky he got a loving brother! (See the next paragraph) I like this villain. I really like it! He is goofy, cartoony, and violent at the same time! But he also love his brother sooo much that he released him from a mental hospital. Speaking about his brother ...

Then we also got Loony Bin Jim alias LBJ alias James, the younger brother of Jigsaw. A psychopathic-high adrenaline-batshit insane-cannibal who eat a male nurse alive. Remember about Jigsaw start crying whenever he saw a mirror? LBJ also loved his brother so much that he broke every single mirror in the vicinity of his brother. Who said a monster couldn't love anyone? 

Speaking about the antagonists ... one of my favorite scene from this movie is when those 2 brothers recruited an army from the darkest part of New York for the final battle. Jigsaw made a speech about "freedom" and "American dream" in front of a gigantic american flag, in front of Chinese triads, Irish mobs, and black gangsters. That was ... SUPERB! Man, I really didn't know whether to be awed or laughed my ass off when I saw that speech for the first time! Now I know. I have to STAND UP and give a SALUTE!! That scene is too awesome to got any other reaction.

The Supporting Casts and Actions

Other than the main casts, the supporting casts are also excellent. Same like Ray Stevenson IS the intimidating Punisher, Wayne Knight IS the resourceful Microchip, and Dash Mihok IS the bumbling detective Soap! 

I also loved the fact that in the final battle, the Punisher used an assault rifle instead of submachine gun like MP5 or machine gun like M60! I always have a soft spot for an assault rifle ...

Oh yeah, he also has a good reason to be alive even after receiving tons of shots from those mobs: he was equipped with dragon skin body armor! Holy shit!

BTW if you are a gun buff, and interested in finding out what kind of guns were used in this movie, check this site!

In the end, this movie is not a financial success. Predictable. Most people are too wimpy, not manly enough to enjoy the Punisher MAX comics, let alone watch this badass movie. No problem, at least I saw ONE awesome Punisher movie.

Final Verdict: 99 out of 100. This film is very enjoyable for me from the beginning until the end. Watch it if you love action, gore, and black humor. RUN FROM IT if you are too wimpy, if blood splattering from decapitated neck makes you scream. You are NOT manly enough to watch this movie!