I Really Love to Master These Languages

Göthe once said something like: "Our world is limited by the language(s) we master."

Amen.

Sadly, nobody has the time, energy, intelligence, and money to master all languages on earth. Therefore, it is an unreachable goal. That's why we selected some languages, languages that are directly useful to us, languages that we love, or both.

There are languages that I really want to learn but after giving it second thought, I decided against it. Here they are, from the one that I most eager to learn to the least eager one. Three factors decide it: aesthetic, usefulness, and easiness. Note that aesthethic is very, very subjective. My taste may differ than yours. On the other hand, easiness is subjective because my native language is Indonesian. 

Latin

Aesthetic: 100/100
Usefulness: 40/100
Easiness: 50/100
Total: 190/300
This is the language of the Roman Empire, the parent language all Romance languages. There is this ... mythical aura, radiated from each Latin words & sentences. I think this is thanks to the fact that Latin is the language of classic literature, the language of many motto, the language of the most powerful empire in ancient Europe, etc. You sounds educated, sophisticated, and smart if you said anything in Latin!

Mastering this language means opening the gate of beauty from the classic literature, the writings of Cicero, Plutarch, Cassius Dio, etc. It is also the language of tons of early Christian documents.

Mastering this language also make learning all Romance languages easier. Those languages are used extensively in Meso and Latin America.

Unfortunately, only limited people use this language in their daily life. That's the only reason why I don't learn it.

I will learn it when: I have free time, money & energy

Esperanto

Aesthetic: 50/100
Usefulness: 20/100
Easiness: 100/100
Total: 170/300
Created in Poland in the beginning of 20th century, this language was designed to be as easy as possible, to be the universal language of the world. That's why this language is very easy!

But, its speakers are limited. No historical texts, literature, or anything written in Esperanto by its creator. This language in practice become a "geek language" just like Klingonese from Star Trek and Elvish from The Lord of The Ring.

I will learn it when: it was used as national language of at least 3 countries ... or one big country.

Japanese

Aesthetic: 70/100
Usefulness: 70/100
Easiness: 20/100
Total: 160/300
I think this is the the most popular foreign language after English and Mandarin. Probably more popular than Mandarin. Hey, this is the original language of manga and anime!  

But, in the end, I don't want to learn it. One of the thing that I hated most is formality. I prefer egalitarian culture and society. This language is ALL ABOUT FORMALITY! 

There are multiple Pronouns that indicate social position. They have different verbs to describe exactly the same activity. The different is in how they emphasize politeness differently. You can't ask "Have you seen my garden?" because it is not modest enough. You have to say "Have you glance my unworthy garden?" At the same time, I also can't say "I have seen your garden" because that is not polite! I have to say "I enjoy your beautiful garden." 

Nuts. Plain nuts.

I will learn it when: they use the Latin alphabet, and they throw away that freakin hierarchical rule.

From wikipedia user OldakQuill

Sanskrit

Aesthetic: 90/100
Usefulness: 30/100
Easiness: 10/100
Total: 130/300
This is the Vedic language, the language of Indian culture that spread to Southeast Asia. Just like Latin, it also has the mythical aura, thanks to its historic importance. Unfortunately, just like Latin too, nobody really use this language in today's everyday life.

Unfortunately, I heard that this language is designed to be AS HARD AS POSSIBLE to ensure the monopolization of knowledge in the hand of few, i.e. the Brahmanic caste. It doesn't use alphabet. Instead, it uses abugida where its vowels got special treatments. Okay ... that is not as easy as alphabet but it can be learned. Oh, It also uses complicated grammar. VERY complicated grammar. For starters, it doesn't have 6 grammatical cases like Russian, or 4 like German, or 1.5 like English, or 1 like Bahasa Indonesia and many Asian languages. No, no, no, it has EIGHT cases: nominative, vocative, accusative, instrumental, dative, ablative, genitive, and locative. Try to stomach that.

No thanks, better use my energy somewhere else.

I will learn it when: I need it to save my life.

Chinese/Mandarin

Aesthetic: 40/100
Usefulness: 70/100
Easiness: 0/100 ... no, actually it is -200/100.
Total: -90/100
This is the language of my ancestors. They said it shows the power of the Chinese culture. So, I should learn it right? Yeah, I should ... but ...

I gave up. Really. I already tried more than once, it is just TOO DAMN HARD! Oh, the fact that I DON'T LIKE HOW IT SOUNDS didn't help either.

Let me reiterate why it is so damn hard:

Because they use tone to differentiate their words.

People in other language used tone to convey EMOTION. To differentiate a statement with a question. To stress the importance of certain part of the sentence. Etc. Not the Chinese and many other tonal languages like Thai, Vietnamese, and many African languages. They use it to differentiate WORDS! If you mess the tone in Mandarin, you can mistake "mother" with "horse" for example. That would be hilarious in a sitcom. Not so if you are the one who make the mistake.

Because the script is just STUPID.
Actually stupid is an understatement for such monstrosity. Seriously, why we need to memorize at least THREE THOUSANDS different characters? How can you write a dictionary or do any kind of sorting with that script? How complicated is the Chinese typing procedure? How can you GUESS how it sounds if you encounter a character for the first time?
I heard Vietnamese is hard too because it is a tonal language like Chinese. But at least they have the common sense to use Latin alphabet!
Sanskrit don't use Latin alphabet, and they have more complicated rules to write their alphabets. But at least their alphabet is not in thousands!
Russian may have complicated grammar and strange-looking alphabet, but at least it is only 33 characters. After one intensive day you can master it and know exactly the sound of each word!

I learn it when: Hell freezes over.
It is an understatement, the chance of hell freezes over is HIGHER than the chance of the Chinese people admit that their logogram script is stupid.  Seriously, I am sure even the need to save my life can't enable me to learn this language.